"In my twenty-seventh year, while riding the metro in Leningrad (St. Petersburg) I was overcome with despair so great that life seemed to stop at once, preempting the future entirely, let alone any meaning. Suddenly, all by itself, a phrase appeared: Without God life makes no sense. Repeating it in astonishment, I rode the phrase up like a moving staircase, got out of the metro & walked into God's light."
- Andrei Bitov (a Russian novelist who grew up under a government which denied the existence of God)
Oh how I can relate. For what purpose are we here for than for something outside of our mere selves? I ponder though at what & whom "God" is as such. Is he a kind and merciful God? if so I struggle to find his clemency at times. Or is he rather a remote being, the very model of a scientist - not wishing to tamper too much with the experiment.
